I just left my sister on her way to the hospital... to deliver baby number 3! I've been excited about this all week, but now that I left her, I feel immensely sad. I decided not to go to my place, but stay the night at my parents... BAD idea. I haven't got my own room anymore since I live alone, so I stay with my brother. His room is huge and we like to talk. But tonight I needed to be by myself. I needed to realize all the things that have happened to me. Also, it's hard to see your little sister have her third child when you can't have children, and never might have. It probably sounds incredibly selfish, I know. I thought I got over it, you know, the anti-hormone therapy, the menopause, the hot flushes... but it all hit me tonight.
I don't feel well...
Oh, darling. You have every right to feel sad and I don't think it's at all selfish. It's hard to accept at your age that you might not be able to have children or if you still can, it will be a long way off. So when you see others having their babies, it's just natural that you feel the loss. It will pass again and you will enjoy holding the little baby. But don't be ashamed to feel sad. These days, 30 is still very young to be able to get a child. Many of my working colleages had their first babies at the end of their 30ies or even in their 40ies. So don't give up hope just yet.
RépondreSupprimerTake care, I love you
Silvia
Not selfish at all, very natural way to feel. How could you feel any other way? But what Silvia says is right: you have plenty of time.
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